Me chief tossed the bag at me sayin’, “Make yerself useful.” So I poked it, and the damn thing squeaked. Opened it up, and out pops a rat. This one had sparkly eyes and a whiff of burnt toast about ‘im. Then the little bugger zapped me with a Ray of Frost!
Turns out, I could tell ‘em what to do. Most of the time. One time I yelled, “Mage Hand me that pie!” and the rat just wiggled its nose, makin’ the pie floated right over. Ate it meself, o’ course. Then the rat vanished, prob’ly back to that tower full o’ scrolls and potions what made ‘em all magic in the first place. Reckon the wizard’s still scratchin’ his head wonderin’ why his traps ain’t workin’.
Best bit? If some sod hurts one o’ me rats, they get a right proper headache for their trouble. Saw a big dumb orc punt one into a wall. Next second, he’s clutchin’ his noggin, sobbin’. Rat poofs away, and I’m laughin’ so hard I nearly forgot to stab ‘im. Chief says I’m wastin’ time with me “rat tricks,” but he ain’t complainin’ when them sparky rats shock his enemies right in the trousers.
Bag of Rats
Wondrous Item, Rare (Requires Attunement)
This bag has 5 charges and regains 1d4+1 expended charges at dawn. As a Magic action, you can expend a charge to open the bag and release a Rat in an unoccupied space within 5 feet of you. It disappears when its Hit Points reach 0 or a minute has passed.
Roll 1d6. On a 3+, choose Dancing Lights, Mage Hand, Minor Illusion, Ray of Frost or Shocking Grasp. The Rat can use a Magic action to cast that cantrip (+5 to hit, DC 13). It shares your initiative count, but it takes its turn immediately after yours. It obeys your verbal commands (no action required by you). If you don’t issue any, it takes the Dodge action and uses its move to avoid danger.
If a creature harms the Rat, it deals 4d6 Psychic damage to the creature, then disappears.
Check out last week’s item: Excalibrrr.
